December 13, 2025

there's a small crack in the corner of my bedroom window. it's not big enough to really do anything about, but big enough that it lets the brutal december wind inside. my bed is also too big for one person. the chill gets into my bedroom and cools down my bed while i'm left to synthesize human warmth with decades-old stuffed animals.

i dream of him a lot when i fall asleep. when i'm left alone with the winter cold and the artificial embrace of polyester, all i can think about is his warmth and the safety that it brings. in those moments i feel almost invincible. nothing has to bother me when he's around.

and when i wake up and remember the miles that separate us, all i can do is send a good morning text and go about my day, wishing i could feel his presence next to me. wishing he was here with me to enjoy the mundaneness of everyday life.

because my heart has memorized his name. and it will always speak it softly.